I wonder how old he was when this picture was taken. Cause he was hot.
While evolutionary psychology suggests that women pass on casual sex due to an inherent lack of sexual desire, Conley says there’s an entirely different reason. She posits that women say “thanks, but no thanks” for fear of being judged. She also says that women have serious reservations about whether a one-night stand would be enjoyable with a new partner. She tries to explain to men, “The reason women are turning you down for casual sex seems to be that, for one thing, a lot of you are calling them sluts afterward.” Also, “A lot of you aren’t bothering to try to be good in bed.” Preach.
You don’t say.
And, of course, this is without speaking to the fear of violence that may be the end result of said one-nighter
"Also, a lot of you aren’t trying to be good in bed"
can I have a tshirt with this on it orrr ??
In our culture “good sex” is usually defined in terms of technique and performance. We overlook that sex is a creative act, which doesn’t need to be critiqued or evaluated.
Sex is creative when it produces a new feeling, insight, or experience. In this exercise some of these possibilities are explored. Look at the following list of experiences. Put a check by any you have had at least once during sex. These are suggestive phrases, to be interpreted as you wish–your own perception of bliss, carefreeness, playfulness, and so on is all you need to go by.
Sense of timelessness
Warm flow in the heart
Merging with partner
Floating sensation, as if the body disappears
Warmth or visible light flowing up the spine
Loss of ego
Nonattachment to your performance
Complete letting go
Sense of wholeness, safety, belonging
Acute awareness of self or surroundings
Peace in the center of your heart.
Now look back over your answers; the experiences you have checked indicate your spiritual horizon. That is, you have learned to use sexual energy to create these experiences.
If you have some only once, these are the envelope of your inner growth. The experiences you have had more than once, especially if recently, indicate the growth you have already integrated into your loving personality.
Go back over the list and mark experiences you haven’t had but think could happen next. These are your spiritual goals. Your desire for them is enough to bring them about; on your inner landscape you are already working toward them.
With spiritual growth comes new creative potential–which can take the form of sexual expression–leading to the realization that you are pure potential, able to fulfill any creative impulse.
My father had taught me to be nice first, because you can always be mean later, but once you’ve been mean to someone, they won’t believe the nice anymore. So be nice, be nice, until it’s time to stop being nice, then destroy them.
You must learn her.
You must know the reason why she is silent. You must trace her weakest spots. You must write to her. You must remind her that you are there. You must know how long it takes for her to give up. You must be there to hold her when she is about to.
You must love her because many have tried and failed. And she wants to know that she is worthy to be loved, that she is worthy to be kept.
And, this is how you keep her.
They say you don’t get over someone until you find someone or something better. As humans, we don’t deal well with emptiness. Any empty space must be filled. Immediately. The pain of emptiness is too strong. It compels the victim to fill that place. A single moment with that empty spot causes excruciating pain. That’s why we run from distraction to distraction—and from attachment to attachment.
westerners are obsessed with the idea of happiness as if it’s a constant state of being. happiness comes in moments. you dont “achieve” happiness. you experience it along with every other emotion on the spectrum. if you spend your life chasing this constructed idea of happiness you will never even be remotely content. work on being whole and feeling everything while increasing the happy moments. stop trying to be a “happy person.” just be a person.
Sometimes I sit and wonder what exactly it is that I am doing with my life.
What am I working towards? Why do I need all of these things that I have around me? Why the fuck do I deal with all of the the bullshit that I do on a daily basis?
Do I really need these things? These people?